Stop being an asshat on Facebook (also probably in real life too)

Part I

Hey you! The idiot on Facebook complaining about how you are "SOOOO BORED!",  you are THE WORST.  Let me break this down for you...you are sitting on the internet. If you don't know, the internet contains a MASSIVE amount of information, about damn near everything.  This is like sitting in the middle of the biggest, best, restaurant in the world that literally serves everything and whining about being hungry.   WHAT ARE YOU DOING?  Google something, anything that you are interested in.  Read.  Research.  Watch Hulu or YouTube tutorials or porn!  Look for new local places to eat or drink.  Or here is another idea....just find something to do away from the computer/iPhone.  Don't get online to tell people you are bored, you are wasting time you could use to go to the library or go outside or go to the gym or just sit mindlessly in front of your TV.  Maybe I'm just very easily entertained (I totally am), but I don't see the point of complaining about being bored and it makes me rage like a crazy person when I see people bitching about it online. Put down the device.  No one gives a crap that you are bored.  You are just making yourself look stupid and BORING.

Part II

It's so sad when someone's relationship status on Facebook changes to "single", not because of the person's new-found freedom but because of all the comments that people leave.  I typically see things like "I'm sorry!" or "DISLIKE!" when someone is newly single and it makes me irrationally angry.  Being single isn't a bad thing.  Clearly something SHITTY happened in their relationship and you should be glad they got out.

I don't comment on people's relationship status changes because I know that Facebook will for some reason not let you totally "hide" it when you make a change to it.  99% of the time people are going to get asked "What happened?" or something equally stupid.  Here is a tip: if you don't know what happened there is a good chance that they don't want you to know.  Their good friends, you know, the real friends they actually like and hang out with outside of Facebook?  They know what happened.  They will help them get through it if they are having a hard time.  Stop being nosy, stop trying to find new gossip information.  Trust me, if they want to put their relationship problems on blast on Facebook they will do so without any prompting.  (I have a few of those idiots blocked from my Newsfeed).

So basically just shut your mouth.  If they want you to know what happened they will tell you.  If they are sad about being single they will tell you. If they don't tell you then you aren't close enough to them to matter. So leave them the hell alone about it and go back to posting about how "bored" you are.

P.S.

The sad thing is that the people who NEED to read this never will because they are too lazy to read anything longer than a Facebook status.